The cats nestle close to their kittens now. / The lambs have laid down with thei
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The cats nestle close to their kittens now. / The lambs have laid down with their sheep. / You’re cozy and warm in you bed, my dear. / Please go the fuck to sleep. The windows are dark in the town, child. / The whales huddle down in the deep. / I’ll read you one very last book if you swear / You’ll go the fuck to sleep. The eagles who soar through the sky are at rest / And the creatures who crawl, run, and creep. / I know you’re not thirsty. That’s bullshit. Stop lying. / Lie the fuck down, my darling, and sleep. The wind whispers soft through the grass, hon. / The field mice, they make not a peep. / It’s been thirty-eight minutes already. / Jesus Christ, what the fuck? Go to sleep. All the kids from day care are in dreamland. / The froggie has made his last leap. / Hell no, you can’t go to the bathroom. / You know where you can go? The fuck to sleep. The owls fly forth from the treetops. / Through the air, they soar and they sweep. / A red crimson rage fills my heart, love. / For real, shut the fuck up and sleep. The cubs and the lions are snoring. / Wrapped in a big snuggly heap. / How is it you can do all this other great shit / But you can’t lie the fuck down and sleep? The seeds slumber beneath the earth now / And the crops that the farmers will reap. / No more questions. This interview’s over. / I’ve got two words for you, kid: fucking sleep. The tiger reclines in the simmering jungle. / The sparrow has silenced her cheep. / Fuck your stuffed bear, I’m not getting you shit. / Close your eyes. Cut the crap. Sleep. The flowers doze low in the meadows / And high on the mountains so steep. / My life is a failure, I’m a shitty-ass parent. / Stop fucking with me, please, and sleep. The giant pangolins of Madagascar are snoozing. / As I lie here and openly weep. / Sure, fine, whatever, I’ll bring you some milk. / Who the fuck cares? You’re not gonna sleep. This room is all I can remember. / The furniture crappy and cheap. / You win. You escape. You run down the hall. / As I nod the fuck off and sleep. Bleary and dazed I awaken / To find your eyes shut, so I keep / My fingers crossed tight as I tiptoe away / And pray that you’re fucking asleep. We’re finally watching our movie. / Popcorn’s in the microwave. Beep. / Oh shit. Goddamn it. You’ve gotta be kidding. / Come on, go the fuck back to sleep. The End. GREATEST BOOK EVER.
